I know what you’re worried about this Ramadan.
You’re worried you’ll make the same mistake you made last Ramadan.
You start out with the best of intentions.
You make great commitments to doing good deeds. You set lofty Ramadan goals for yourself. And you really want this Ramadan to be your BEST ONE YET.
And yet somehow, you always feel a little deflated when you notice you’re lagging behind at some point in the middle of Ramadan….
Your motivations start fizzling out, giving way to the realisation that you’re struggling to balance your personal Ramadan goals…
By the end of Ramadan, you accept that you didn’t manage to memorise as much Qur’an as you wanted, or you didn’t give as much in charity as you wanted, and you resolve to do better next Ramadan.
But next Ramadan the whole cycle begins again.
And here you are again.
The collateral damage from the previous Ramadan always spurring you on to do more and to do it better with the upcoming Ramadan.
And that’s not necessarily a bad thing.
But it’s clear that you’re stuck in a cycle that needs breaking.
How do we break the cycle? And actually make the most of Ramadan then?
It starts with figuring out how we can make the much needed shift and start achieving those Ramadan goals, instead of lagging behind.
Thankfully; there’s just one simple thing we need to realise:
It’s a mistake to set goals that you know you won’t be able to manage.
When we bite off more than we can chew, we are setting ourselves up for demotivation. We won’t be able to keep up and that’s when the problems always start.
To break the cycle, simply set a realistically achievable goal for yourself.
And resist the temptation to expect more from yourself, it’s just not realistic.
If you achieve your goals this Ramadan, you can always build on that success with the next Ramadan, and that’s a much better place to start each Ramadan from.
It helps to cut back on your homeschooling commitments during Ramadan. To maximise your chances of achieving those goals and make space for more important things. Like all the extra worship you’ve got planned.
When you prioritise Ramadan in this way, you set the tone for Ramadan in your household.
A tone your children will remember inshaAllah.
Remember: small but consistent acts of worship are better than big time-consuming actions that you can’t upkeep for long, and then leave off because you burnt yourself out.
The Prophet (ﷺ) was once asked, “What deeds are loved most by Allah?” He said, “The most regular constant deeds even though they may be few.” He added, ‘Don’t take upon yourselves, except the deeds which are within your ability.“
(Sahih al-Bukhari 6465)
Break the cycle this Ramadan.
Set smaller achievable goals that you can work on consistently, and start achieving those Ramadan goals inshaAllah.